Living life with Grace
Okay,
I thought Jerry's response to Jen's REJECTION was really graceful (Bachelorette upset). I have to admire Jen's chutzpa. I mean, she could have accepted the proposal to make everyone happy. But she didn't. I can't be mad at her for doing what she wants to do. The world is so mixed up, isn't it? I've definitely decided not to watch the next Bachelor.
Jerry accepted the rejection with grace. I don't know why that made me think about accepting life's stress and disappointments with graciousness, dignity, kindness, grace. I truly believe one of life's biggest lessons is about learning to walk gracefully--not being reactionary. My friend Rachel teaches me about this grace as I observe her life. She is kind. Treats people who hurt her with love and gentleness. I've watched the devil use people to try to destroy her confidence in the past few months, yet she still faces life with dignity, presses on, and succeeds. She is my role model right now. I want to lash out at times. And at times I do. I'm learning to stand back, count to ten, pray while I'm counting and then ask Jesus for the right response. Rachel lives this life. Her committment to Jesus and the work of the ministry inspires me. My heart is just bursting with love for my friend tonight. I pray that Jesus will do something extra special for her soon, to show her how amazing He thinks she is.
Today, I made an appointment to begin piano lessons. I am an okay piano player. I plunk around with chords, to an untrained ear, I sound okay. But anyone who knows how to play, knows better. :) I was talking to my mom the other day about living the dream. She is an aspiring author like so many of my friends and acquaintances and told me how my life looks to some people. I'm a full time writer. Where I set out to be. where many, many aspiring writers want to be. I'm so grateful to God. But as much as I love my work, I am NOT living the fullness of my dream. I told my mom that on a scale where you have zero and then little lines and then a 1 and then more lines and then a 2, i feel like I might be at the first line between zero and one on a scale that goes up to 100 in terms of where I am and where I'm going to be some day. I am a big dreamer.
I want to play the piano better. I want to paint a picture (a good one, NOT the Mona Lisa, but no paint by number either). I want to lose 130 lbs. I want to run a marathon (I really, really want to run a marathon). I want to be on The Amazing Race with my friend Susie Warren. (And BTW, SHE'S doing the bunji jumping, I have to eat the gross stuff). I want to cut a CD someday. I want to write a really good song and actually sell it to someone who can record it. i don't know...I think these dreams are attainable. But do I have the grace to walk out the committment it will take to achieve EACH of these dreams let alone all of them. I don't know. I really don't. But I am starting wiht walking on my treadmill, eating better, (Chickened out on the Daniel fast). It's a start. I'm 35 years old. Oprah ran her marathon at 40 years old.
I have other dreams that I have hidden inside that only Jesus knows. They're too precious to share. Dreams can be crushed by one raised eyebrow, one short laugh. Mary hid the angel's word regarding Jesus in her heart until the time to reveal the plan was right. Even some of these that I've shared are risky. People are cynical, and cynics intimidate me. To look at me, who would think I could lose enough weight or ever get into proper shape to run a block let alone a marathon. But jesus put this dream in my heart when I was 14 years old. I believe He did. And I've never let it go. But I've never worked for it either. Time is a factor. I admit. Sometimes I think I'm not rowing with both oars. :) The tighter the deadlines, the more I take on. I need grace to work it all out. Grace and chocolate, but then....the chocolate will make me unable to lose weight. I need Peace. Grace and Peace. And sleep.
Good night.
:)
I thought Jerry's response to Jen's REJECTION was really graceful (Bachelorette upset). I have to admire Jen's chutzpa. I mean, she could have accepted the proposal to make everyone happy. But she didn't. I can't be mad at her for doing what she wants to do. The world is so mixed up, isn't it? I've definitely decided not to watch the next Bachelor.
Jerry accepted the rejection with grace. I don't know why that made me think about accepting life's stress and disappointments with graciousness, dignity, kindness, grace. I truly believe one of life's biggest lessons is about learning to walk gracefully--not being reactionary. My friend Rachel teaches me about this grace as I observe her life. She is kind. Treats people who hurt her with love and gentleness. I've watched the devil use people to try to destroy her confidence in the past few months, yet she still faces life with dignity, presses on, and succeeds. She is my role model right now. I want to lash out at times. And at times I do. I'm learning to stand back, count to ten, pray while I'm counting and then ask Jesus for the right response. Rachel lives this life. Her committment to Jesus and the work of the ministry inspires me. My heart is just bursting with love for my friend tonight. I pray that Jesus will do something extra special for her soon, to show her how amazing He thinks she is.
Today, I made an appointment to begin piano lessons. I am an okay piano player. I plunk around with chords, to an untrained ear, I sound okay. But anyone who knows how to play, knows better. :) I was talking to my mom the other day about living the dream. She is an aspiring author like so many of my friends and acquaintances and told me how my life looks to some people. I'm a full time writer. Where I set out to be. where many, many aspiring writers want to be. I'm so grateful to God. But as much as I love my work, I am NOT living the fullness of my dream. I told my mom that on a scale where you have zero and then little lines and then a 1 and then more lines and then a 2, i feel like I might be at the first line between zero and one on a scale that goes up to 100 in terms of where I am and where I'm going to be some day. I am a big dreamer.
I want to play the piano better. I want to paint a picture (a good one, NOT the Mona Lisa, but no paint by number either). I want to lose 130 lbs. I want to run a marathon (I really, really want to run a marathon). I want to be on The Amazing Race with my friend Susie Warren. (And BTW, SHE'S doing the bunji jumping, I have to eat the gross stuff). I want to cut a CD someday. I want to write a really good song and actually sell it to someone who can record it. i don't know...I think these dreams are attainable. But do I have the grace to walk out the committment it will take to achieve EACH of these dreams let alone all of them. I don't know. I really don't. But I am starting wiht walking on my treadmill, eating better, (Chickened out on the Daniel fast
I have other dreams that I have hidden inside that only Jesus knows. They're too precious to share. Dreams can be crushed by one raised eyebrow, one short laugh. Mary hid the angel's word regarding Jesus in her heart until the time to reveal the plan was right. Even some of these that I've shared are risky. People are cynical, and cynics intimidate me. To look at me, who would think I could lose enough weight or ever get into proper shape to run a block let alone a marathon. But jesus put this dream in my heart when I was 14 years old. I believe He did. And I've never let it go. But I've never worked for it either. Time is a factor. I admit. Sometimes I think I'm not rowing with both oars. :) The tighter the deadlines, the more I take on. I need grace to work it all out. Grace and chocolate, but then....the chocolate will make me unable to lose weight. I need Peace. Grace and Peace. And sleep.
Good night.
:)
posted by Tracey Bateman at 10:12 PM
2 Comments:
Now may the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.
An overflowing of hope? Oh yeah, baby.
Tracey, love your blog. Just love your honesty.
Tell you what. You do what you need to do, and I'll put down these nasty Virginia Slims and run that marathon with you. You name the date (not the first quarter of the year, please.)
Always wanted to do that.
Oh, I'm stealing Angie's prayer there... I agree with her in the name of Jesus... But I want it for me too! ;-)
Also agree with her about loving your blog and honesty.
I would join ya'll in the marathon (always wanted to do that) but I don't know if my ankles could take it. I imagine if you put the word out there will be tons of us ACFWers more than willing to support you in this among other things.
Keep on being that big dreamer, don't let anyone take those away from you. Don't let the cynics intimidate you. When God puts a dream in you, you are meant to fulfil it. No matter how crazy it sounds. I know how that is. God has given me some pretty crazy dreams. Do I sometimes think there isn't any way they will ever be fulfilled? of course I do, but I remind myself that He gave me those dreams for a purpose. He has bigger and better things for us, bigger and better than even those big crazy dreams we have. So you hold on to those dreams and keep them hidden if that is what you need, but I'm going to pray that they come about. ;-)
Post a Comment
<< Home